Eva Claire's Sunny Days

New Blog Address

2011-12-23T16:58:00.000-08:00

I've moved Eva's blog over to wordpress. Join us there for more Eva news and happenings! All the posts on this blog have been imported to the new blog. At present, the videos don't appear to have transferred correctly so I'll look into that further in my spare time. Haha. Spare time. *snort*

Go here! ---> http://evaclairessunnydays.wordpress.com/ <---

Bad Blogger, Bad!

2011-02-13T12:11:00.000-08:00

It's still technically Winter so a post about Winter Break isn't too tardy. It falls within the two-month window regarding Holiday Blogs. I read that somewhere; it must be true.

Haven't we all just recovered from our Christmas and New Year holiday hangovers? Tacky decor is stuffed in the attic and forgotten till next Thanksgiving weekend. Holiday pounds are falling off (for some of us. I'm not bragging or anything. If I were, it'd be because I hadn't gained a few pounds in the form of homemade fudge). Credit card bills are getting paid off and family quarrels are already turning into humorous stories to retell every year at Christmas dinner. And here I go, dragging all this stuff up like I do the used wrapping paper and tissue (Just smooth it out! It's perfectly good!)

In the spirit of reusing Perfectly Good memories, I bring you: Our Winter Vacation--The Highlights.

Um, *rattling memory* there were play dates, if I recall correctly. Flynn with a super fancy dress because she knows "Eva really likes that kind of stuff". True. She does. Eva selected a super fancy Holiday (read: Easter) dress at Costco recently and declared that she was going to wear it to play at Flynn's house. She looks reminiscent of a Peep. It's very cute. But I digress...

We played at a classmate's house. He had about 200 Matchbox cars, a race track and a cool older sister. Eva wants to return. We had a few more play dates and dinners with old friends. Went to a Solstice/Going Away party for our dear friends who are off to new adventures in Berkeley.

Eva had been anticipating Santa's arrival (at the mall...) since November. We told her he wouldn't come until December. I like to maintain the rare bit of my sanity by ignoring all things Christmas until December 1. I believe it might even make me live longer. Happier, at least.

We went at dinner-hour, to avoid a crowd. Turns out Santa feeds his reindeer at that time so we had half an hour to wait. We went to every little (and big) girl's favorite store: Claire's. Oh, the shiny, glittery, feathery, gaudy, tacky fun.

As usual, Eva was quiet and shy with Santa. She sat on my lap on the wide, sturdy armrest and quietly told Santa what she wanted. She politely asked for a Mary Poppins DVD. Daddy snapped some pictures. (The elves charge a mint for their pics and wouldn't have gotten a "good" one of everyone smiling at the camera. That's not why we go anyway--it's about talking with Santa).

This year, Santa gave Eva a special gift--a reindeer jingle bell with a sparkly red ribbon that he gives to only his most special kids. Every time it rings, it means Santa loves her.

We spend five fun-filled days with family in the South Sound. Eva's shiny new cousin arrived just before Christmas so we all had time to snuggle the sweet wee babe. Eva was delighted that Santa remembered to bring Mary Poppins for her.

New Year's Eve was spent as in past years. At home. Eva wakes up crying and confused about 11:45 p.m. as the neighborhood gets noisy with fireworks. The celebrants are unaware of the trauma they inflict on our child with sensory issues--especially sudden bursts of noise. So we hold her, shaky and groggy, and sit on the couch to watch the fireworks show at the Space Needle on TV. She loves Seattle and it calms her to see the beauty of the fireworks without the racket. After an hour, the fireworks are all blown up and we go (back) to bed. Welcome to 2011!

Gettin' the Party Started

2010-12-31T20:46:00.000-08:00

Today, Eva and I danced to her Party Mix CD (I made a cd of poppy dance songs from 2005 and 2006 that she loved when she was a baby and toddler). The sun was shining in our bedrooms and we were all smiles. We had a fun little pre-New Year's Eve rock out party.

In the above video, the first song is a clean version of Hollaback Girl by Gwen Stefani (Eva calls it "the banana song"), followed by SexyBack by Justin Timberlake.

Happy New Year!

Shhh...You'll Startle It...

2010-12-02T10:13:00.000-08:00

I haven't wanted to say it aloud, for fear of jinxing it or scaring it away like a wild deer (though not the deer in my neighborhood that stare at me and go back to nibbling my roses). But it IS a pretty huge milestone. Eva's wearing panties! No diapers. I am beyond happy. Beyond.

I can't say we did anything to make this happen, this time around. Just all the stuff They say to do: potty books, potty video, go with Mommy to potty, little potty chair, set up a routine, talk about it a lot--but not with any pressure! Yeah, we did all of that since she was 2 1/2 and had her first stint of success. But she protested fiercely; it went away. Back and forth a few times. I was out of ideas and tricks; she was getting too old to buy into the games and has never been one to be motivated by bribes. They say it'll happen when the child is ready--and not before. I had to let it go and trust.

Over the summer, I started telling her, matter-of-factly and without blame or guilt (I hope) that I was done changing her diapers. I didn't want to do it anymore. I refused to read her potty books to her the sporadic times she was sitting, saying I didn't think she needed it anymore. She was a big girl and could do this on her own. After a bit, I think she started to believe me.

In many ways, teaching her to use the potty was no different than teaching a typical child. One thing that differed was that her gross and fine motor skills are not as refined as a typical child. So while I was waiting for her to take an interest in using the potty, I worked with her, outside of the bathroom and without mentioning the potty, on the skills she needed to be successful. Signing "toilet" before she could speak (language). Practicing standing up and sitting down, over and over (gross motor). Getting pants on and off (fine motor). She would "help" me go and tell me what to do next. She would flush the toilet for me. She knew what to do, she just needed that secret motivator to get her to do it.

I think peer pressure at school this year did the trick. And the staff work hard with the kids to learn to use the toilet and stay dry. The other two girls in her Supported Kindergarten wear pretty panties and she wanted to be like them. One day, several weeks ago, she came home from school and said she wanted to wear pretty panties, too. OK! We gathered up some hand-me-downs, bought some exciting new Tinkerbell panties and that was it! The first couple days were a little rough, but after that, she has done amazingly well. It's been rather easy (if you don't consider the five years and nine months of diapers before that, but who's counting). Hooray Eva!

Autumn Fun

2010-10-30T14:53:00.000-07:00

I love this time of year, when the bright hot busy summer slides into the quieter cooler autumn. The billowing clouds and multicolored leaves against the crisp blue sky encourage quiet contemplation during a long walk. Our busy summer social calendar gives way to back-to-school routine, tidying up the yard and craft projects on rainy days. That said, we've still managed to be quite busy.

My brother visited us from Oregon and we all loved having him here. Eva and her Uncle Tommy had loads of fun playing and it makes my heart smile to see the ease with which Tom interacts with Eva. The absolute attention and devotion he gives to their play time reminds me of how my dad played with us as kids. And his borderline relentless teasing and repeated pokes to Eva's belly remind me of how he and I "played" as kids. Since I was the pokee, as little sister, I say "played" with sarcasm. ;)

Got your nose!

Ppppbt!

Eva and I and some good friends visited my favorite pumpkin patch recently. Gordon Skagit Farms in the Skagit Valley is an amazingly beautiful place. (http://www.gordonskagitfarms.com/) Everything is artistically arranged and displayed to the smallest detail. Many of the owner's rural landscape oil paintings hang around the property and on the side of the barn. There are incredible photo ops everywhere you look. And so, I take lots of photos each time we go there.

Eva and her friend explore the many kinds of pumpkins and squash

Eva chose six apples for us to take home. I chose an armload of butternut squash and some spaghetti squash to make a delicious casserole. This year, Eva was brave enough to see the haunted barn with the witch, her bubbling cauldron and assorted creepy things. We wandered out to the corn maze and pumpkin patch, admiring the 360 degree views of the valley and surrounding hills blanketed with turbulent upswept clouds. We went back the next week for more apples and squash. Mommy & Daughter fun!

This way! To the pumpkins!

Eva composed and shot this photo (I helped her hold my super expensive camera). Pretty good, huh?

Eva and I made acorns one lazy Sunday morning. Get a bunch of fresh donut holes (LaFeen's sells them a dozen for $1. Or if you're cute like me, the guy behind the counter will give you 18 for $1). Dip one end in melted chocolate (I used 88% dark chocolate, to cut the sweetness!) Roll that end in chopped peanuts. Stick a pretzel in the end for the stem. Voila! Cute AND yummy!

Eva was only mildly interested in this project but helped me chop the peanuts and ate a few pretzels before getting down from her chair and wandering off to do something more fun. She doesn't like sweets at all so the finished product was nothing more than a silly thing to make. She did show quite a bit of pride in "her" creations when she took them out to the garage to show Daddy.

HAPPY AUTUMN!

Happenings

2010-09-21T09:46:00.000-07:00

In addition to losing her first teeth and starting Kindergarten, Eva has moved up to a booster seat in the car and got a new big girl bed. So much happening.

I found this beautiful solid pine junior loft bed on Craigslist. The standard twin mattress is about 3 feet off the ground. She and I went shopping for new sheets and she chose these grape-colored ones. The rainbow pillow case was a find at the thrift store.

What makes this bed so awesome (aside from the gorgeous pine and solid construction) is that it has a free-standing storage cabinet (below, in pic) and free-standing 3-drawer dresser that also fits under the bed. The bookcase pulls out to reveal a 3 1/2-foot long desktop. Behind the cabinet and bookcase is a wonderful hiding place (or room for storage). You can see a pillow through the ladder. It's a fantastically efficient piece of furniture.

Eva has spent a LOT of time playing in her room with her new bed and all of its stuff. Every time we go in her room she exclaims, "I have a new bed! Oh! Look at my new bed!" She tells everyone who will listen about her new bed. She's happy; I'm happy.

Some kids love to walk in the rain with an umbrella or stomp in puddles. Eva loves to sweep puddles.

Wearing her cute ladybug rain boots. She does stomp in puddles, but when she does it, she's stomp/tap dancing and clapping rhythms.

Soaking wet and happy!

Kindergarten!!

2010-09-11T12:27:00.000-07:00

The customary First-Day-of-School-Picture-in-Front-of-the-Garage-Door

Eva enthusiastically started Kindergarten this week. She had a great time getting to know a new school, new teachers, new routines and new friends (and seeing some old friends from Preschool). The staff tell me she has been doing very well with work time and is having fun at recess, in music and at the library.

She's been anxiously awaiting Kindergarten since she started to spend some time in the mainstream Kinder class when she was in Preschool. By 7:30 a.m. on the first day, she was dressed and dancing and hoola hooping around the living room and making snow angels in the carpet to her Party Mix CD I made for her (her favorite dance/techno and lively pop songs).

So excited she can hardly stand it! (This is at 7:30 a.m.--2 hours before school starts).

Eva is going five days a week for a few hours a day to a public elementary school that has the Primary Life Skills program for the district. I don't like the term "Life Skills" because it makes it sound like they're learning how to cook, make their beds and balance their checkbooks. They're little kids. They're learning the same things other little kids are learning. The just need a little more teacher time and assistance. I prefer a "Supported Classroom". So anyway, she is there.

There are two Supported Classrooms at the school with Kinders, 1st- and 2nd-graders combined. One class generally has the Kinders and those in need of more support. The other class, the one Eva is in, generally has older kids and those who have more skills and abilities. She is one of two Kinders in this class with eight 1st- and 2nd-graders. Other Kinders in the district don't start classes until this Monday, but since Eva's class has mostly 1st- and 2nd-graders, her teacher said I could bring her this week if I wanted to. Sure! The more school the better!

I'm glad she is in this class and will have the older kids from whom to model. I'm grateful that the staff recognized that she has the skills to be able to succeed in a more challenging environment. And that I didn't have to petition for her to be given the opportunity to be in this class, which I would have if she'd been assigned to the other class. I am very proud of her.

Hooray for new adventures!

Growing Up and Gratitude

2010-09-06T21:44:00.000-07:00

   I'm composing this post in my head this evening while Eva slips into a snuggly slumber in my lap. They're so sweet when they're unconscious, aren't they? My memory recalls moments when she was a tiny baby (though she was never tiny) and I would hold her in my arms in this same wide chair. I would look out the window at the broiling clouds and get lost in thought—or no thought—with Eva’s newborn breath making a spot of my neck warm as she slept on my chest. Soft quiet inhalation, soft sighing exhalation.
   I gazed at her, memorizing her every millimeter, her every angle. I watched her eyebrows come in and how the deep blue of her irises had more and more pale blue flecks in them as the days passed. The flecks slowly decorated her irises but left a thick deep blue ring around the outer edge. I gazed at her. She gazed at me. She curled up in my embrace and inside my heart and slept deeply.
   And now, I gaze at my little big girl resting her head against my chest and smile to myself. She is changing, growing so much.

1. She has just grown out of her car seat and we put her new booster seat in today. She was SO excited and felt very grown up!
2. She's lost three teeth now (we found the third one in her bed one morning after it fell out overnight) all in a row. She sticks her tongue through the gap and smiles widely. As before, she took her Tooth Fairy money to the Farmer's Market and gave it to one of her favorite buskers: Richard, a kindly man in a pressed white dress shirt and Carhartt overalls who sings old southern work songs and honkey-tonk country, a capella.

3. She has been totally interested in outer space lately. She wants to go there and to learn all about it. I'm ecstatic about this because astronomy is one of my favorite subjects to go on and on about (after meteorology and maps). So we looked at NASA images of the moon surface, the earth, the sun, galaxies, nebula. It. Blew. Her. Mind. I talked about how there is no sound in outer space, which I knew would be really intriguing to her since she is skittish about noise. We got a book at the library about Mars and a Bill Nye DVD about the Moon. I'm gonna tell her everything she can handle about astronomy.

4. Her recent favorite show to watch is Stomp (a dance troupe that uses the body and ordinary objects to create a percussive theatre performance). Everything in our house is a percussive instrument to tap or bang on. We've collected an assortment of sticks, brooms, tubes, tubs, boxes and plastic bags for her to stretch her creativity. One of the acts the performers do is an increasingly difficult call-and-response rhythm with the audience. The other day, while we were in the kitchen, Eva was hopping and stomping and clapping, as per usual. She turned to me and clapped twice. Pause. Clap clap. Pause. Clap clap. I responded: clap clap. She squealed and clap-clapped again. I responded. She tried out a few other rhythms and jumped up and down laughing with joy when I repeated her rhythms back to her. Something major connected in her brain with this one!
5. I was in the shower; had just turned the water off. A little hand pushes the shower curtain aside. She is holding a granola bar. "Here mommy! A granola bar for YOU!" "Oh thank you honey! But I don't want one right now--I'm all wet." She stares at me, arms limply at her sides, a granola bar in each hand. She brightens, "I have a granola bar today, too! You help me open it, please?" I tell her I will after I dry off. She stares blankly at me again and toddles off. When I come out in my robe, there are two granola bars (still in wrappers) on the living room floor and she'd moved on to something else.
6. She was "helping me" fold a load of towels. I showed her how to fold a washcloth--two steps. She was so excited and practiced over and over and over, talking her way through it. Joy for new small things!
7. I had a hamper full of darks on the couch to fold. She dumped them out on the couch (Oh! Is she going to help fold?); took the hamper to the floor, climbed in and watched TV.

Eva starts Kindergarten tomorrow. She's back at gymnastics next week and will be spending an afternoon a week at Montessori soon. I'm feeling blessed, grateful and smiled upon. I was sweeping out the garage the other day and focused on feeling gratitude--not thinking the words or lists of things I'm grateful for--just feeling.

Near Miss

2010-08-17T20:16:00.000-07:00

Today, Eva and I were driving to an appointment. As we came down the busy street by our house, Eva said, "Too fast, Mama. You're going too fast." I checked my speedometer and was going the speed limit. "Slow down, Mama. Slow down." I paused while we talked; slowed some.

A few blocks later we came to a lighted intersection, our green light. I swear my front wheels were on the crosswalk when a car from the other direction quickly turned left in front of me. I slammed on the breaks to miss it. Eva and I were alright, though rattled.

She whimpered a bit in her car seat behind me and said quietly, "Slow down, Mama." The conversation gave me chills. "Thank you for reminding Mama to be safe, Little Bear." She smiled, relieved.

Missing: Two Teeth

2010-08-04T09:48:00.001-07:00

No really. They're missing. We don't know where they went.

Eva lost her first tooth the other day while at summer camp. It was super wiggly but IN when I dropped her off and was OUT when I picked her up. She didn't know it was gone and neither did the teachers. I'm assuming it came out with a bite of sandwich and ended up in her belly with her lunch...until it comes out the other end. I'm not going to "look for it" but if it shows up readily...well, I don't think I'll wash it off and keep it anyway. The idea of keeping her discarded little fangs grosses me out a bit. So to keep one that traveled through her digestive tract...*shudder*. No thank you. Besides, the Tooth Fairy already came and left her a dollar in her little box under her pillow. It's not required, you know, to present said fallen-out tooth in order to receive the prize. The Tooth Fairy knows she lost her tooth. The Tooth Fairy knows everything, like Santa Claus or a mother-in-law.

So I moped around the other day, feeling bummed about not having her first tooth (her FIRST TOOTH, dammit!) and collected sympathetic outrage from other mommies. I ripped weeds out of the soil by the handful and allowed myself to feel annoyed; to feel that *ping* in my chest that my girl keeps getting more grown up.

The next day, I took Eva to summer camp and talked to the teachers again. They were (rightfully) sympathetic for my loss as a mommy. I warned them, "The tooth right next to the gap is REALLY loose and will probably come out today. I tried to pull it this morning. Keep an eye out". One teacher, a mother of a young girl who'd recently lost her first couple teeth, was especially determined to catch this loose tooth.

A few hours later, I came to pick Eva up. She ran across the yard to me grinning, "My mommy's here! That's MY mmmoommyyyy!" Hug hug, yeah, yeah, yeah. I pulled her bottom lip down. The second tooth was gone. Crap! I turned to one of the teachers, "She lost another tooth?" Blank stare. The above-mentioned sympathetic teacher came over and exclaimed, "She lost it?! I kept looking and she had it! I sat with her at lunch and checked after almost every bite! It was there when she went out to play! I don't know how this could have happened. I'm so sorry!" Well, thanks, lady. Sorry helps as does the obvious effort she put in to make sure I got that tooth. Alas.

It's probably out in the yard, mixed in with all the tiny pieces of gravel and dirt and tree bits. Maybe it's in the chicken coop. Whatever. The Tooth Fairy will still come. She knows all; maybe she knows where these two teeth disappeared to.

P.S. We've been talking about this whole Tooth Fairy story as a family, preparing Eva for what to do and what happens. She repeats, "My tooth comes out and I give to Mommy and Daddy! Then in the box, the Tooffairy comes when I sleep and get MONIES! Put in my pig bank." Ta da! I asked her yesterday what she wanted to spend her money on. She said "Put in my pig bank. We go to Farmer's Market? With Mommy and Daddy? I give it to violin, singing man, oooh, big bass!" (She wants to give it to one of the buskers at the market. How cool is that?) I love my girl.

Preschool Graduation!

2010-07-08T07:40:00.000-07:00

OK, so I'm a little behind here but summer's just too full of fun outdoorsy things to do (and I refuse to take my laptop outside and ruin all that blessed relaxation). A few weeks ago Eva graduated from Preschool. She'll be headed to Kindergarten in the fall in a supported classroom (the district calls it "Life Skills" but I hate that term). It's a class for Kinders, 1st- and 2nd-graders with special needs. I'm excited for Eva to have the older kids to model from. There will be regular opportunities for Eva to spend some time in the mainstream Kindergarten class, too, which she also did this year.

The preschool graduates, families, teachers and therapists met at a local park for play, food and more play. Each graduate received a darling green felt mortarboard and tassel and a certificate.

Picking out a flower for Mommy.

Happy Summer! Look out Kindergarten, here comes Eva!

Busy, Busy, Busy!

2010-06-14T20:43:00.001-07:00

Wow, we've been busy. No wonder I'm a cross between excited and tired. Here's a rundown of our recent activities.

Nothing like a game of Chase Daddy Around the Driveway with a floppy 4-foot sapling to start a morning off with giggles.

"Tickle tickle, Daddy!!"

Running running running!

Eva's school hosted a Special Olympics Play Date for the littler kids. Eva is dancing to music at the Scarf Station; in her happy place.

Another station involved throwing a Nerf football to hit the targets on the wall. Eva has a great arm and hit every target from several feet away. Yay, Eva!

Eva and her good friend, Colin, enjoy some time in a park by our house.

Eva finished another session of gymnastics. She is playing hide-and-seek with me after the class' final performance.

There are often chair cushions and pillows on the floor as Eva constructs her own gym at home. She is practicing a somersault here. Going up...

...and over! Whee!

Every year, we try to get to Seattle for the Folklife Festival. Lots of music and lots of people to watch. And, of course, the massive fountain at the Seattle Center (that doesn't look so big from this perspective, but look closely at the size of the people in the background).

The NW Junior Pipe Band performed. They recently went to a worldwide pipe band competition in Scotland and placed fifth!

Eva cheers, "YAY BAGPIPES!!" She lives and dreams bagpipes.

But she also enjoys dancing and grooving to a stand up bass and fiddle duo. One of the many many musicians Eva stopped to listen to (and talk to and smile and applaud).

Just hanging out in the play set at home, being happy and silly.

Happy Spring, Everyone!!

The Return of Fish Face

2010-05-12T11:41:00.000-07:00

For those of you who knew Eva as a baby, you may recall that she often made a fish face. Like, all the time. It was pretty remarkable considering her massively chubby cheeks.

She did it for a few months and stopped. And then forgot how to make it, couldn't get her cheeks sucked in enough, her lips puckered enough. Well, I'm happy to announce that the fish face has returned!

A couple weeks ago, she just started making it again. Often. Like, all the time. Maybe they were working on it at school or in speech therapy? At any rate, it warms my heart to see her little pucker-y face again. *muah!*

Books We Love to Read Over and Over...

2010-04-04T15:55:00.000-07:00

Eva has always loved books--and now she can even read a few words! She got some new books for her birthday that we love and thought you might enjoy them, too.

Freckleface Strawberry by Julianne Moore

This charming story, with cute illustrations, tells the story of a little girl who "was just like everybody else" except for one thing...freckles. She tries to get rid of her freckles because the other kids, while not unkind, bring attention to her difference. In the end, she grows up, just like everybody else, and doesn't care so much about her freckles anymore.

I really love the message to this story that even if your situation doesn't change, you can learn to love yourself for your difference. Even if Eva doesn't get the subtlety of this message, it brings me peace to know that it's there.

Llama Llama Mad at Mama by Anna Dewdney

This sweet story tells us about little Llama Llama who goes shopping with his Mama but, due to several reasons, gets mad at Mama and throws a tantrum in the store. The author does a fantastic job showing we adults the little (to us) things that happened to lead up to Llama Llama's tantrum.

This book has given Eva and me an opportunity to talk about feelings and reactions--Llama Llama's and Mama's. She and I have always talked about the "Store Rules" before going into a store. She says to me: No whining, no kicking, no yelling and listen to Mama. So we talk about how Llama Llama doesn't follow the store rules and what he could have done to tell his Mama he was bored/mad/hungry instead of throwing a tantrum. And the rhyming cadence is fun to read, too!

Knuffle Bunny and Knuffle Bunny Too by Mo Willems

In Knuffle Bunny, we see young Trixie going on an errand with her Daddy. She loses her stuffed bunny and a communication breakdown ensues before she and bunny are reunited at the end. The sequel, Knuffle Bunny Too, tells the story of preschool Trixie taking her special, one-of-a-kind bunny to school only to find that another classmate has a nearly identical bunny. Trixie deals with conflict, hurt feelings and mistaken identity before the happy ending.

Mo Willems is a genius storyteller and illustrator. Like Anna Dewdney, he does a superb job telling the story how a child might by including things adults dismiss as unimportant and using a child's logic. I am also impressed by his unique style of illustrating his stories. He takes black and white photos of his neighborhood in New York City and draws his characters and selected accessories on top of them.

I hope these favorite stories inspire you to visit your local library or expand your home library. Happy storytime!

Eva's Gymnastics

2010-04-03T09:58:00.000-07:00

Eva just completed her first session at a gymnastics place in town. Her class is for 3 1/2 to 5-year-olds and introduces basic gymnastics movements and equipment. She had a great time playing with girls her age and learning how to do new things with her body. On the last day of the session, parents were welcomed into the gym to see a performance.

After the performance, Eva wanted to show me how she swings on the uneven bars. Her teacher, Kelsey, helps her in the video below.

Everyone got a ribbon!

I am very proud of Eva for doing so well listening to directions, following along, waiting her turn and being brave to try new things with her body. She learned how to do a summersault, walk sideways, hang onto a bar to swing and many other little things. She'll start the next session after a week break and is very excited. Yay, Eva!

A small tirade followed by little celebrations...

2010-02-10T21:59:00.000-08:00

Now, I know I don't post here as much as some of you in the blogosphere would like. It's not that I don't marvel at the joy and my blessings every day. It's not that I don't want to share them with you, my friends and strangers. I don't write here to share every time Eva has a cold or the days when she and I aren't getting along or the stresses I feel as a mother to this child (which are great sometimes but I have another place for those words). I am keenly aware of airing my family's dirty laundry for the world to see and, being a private person, I will not do it.

I do not wish to hold up Eva's accomplishments as a means of comparison with other children with Down syndrome or other disabilities or with typically developing children. One of the mantras I wrote for myself very early in my motherhood with Eva is "Do not compare." I realized quickly that I would destroy myself and my family if I became consumed with comparing every aspect of her existence with other babies and with the baby I had in my mind that I was "supposed" to be a mother to.

This blog is a place for celebration. For learning, rejoicing, and honoring the things that make Eva the fabulous little girl that she is. I'm not here to prove anything to anybody or to persuade or to garner pity. I am here to share little glimpses into the heart of my girl so that you may feel your heart swell for a moment as mine does every day that I am blessed to have her by my side.

Here are a few examples of Eva's fabulousness:

--A couple weeks ago, Eva called me, for the first time, "Turkey Lips" and laughed hysterically. It caught me off guard and I laughed, too. I don't know where she got that phrase or why she thinks it's funny but she did. She's only said it that one time.

--(In a breach from my preference to not share medical news...) Last week, we thought she was getting a bladder/urinary tract infection. After she told me her tummy hurt and pointed beneath her (super cute outie) bellybutton, I explained to her what her bladder is and how it works. Basic, simple sentences. She nodded and processed. Then she told the story back to me to further process it. She said "My body make potty and fill (b)ladder, a balloon, fill up, up, up and POP!" She laughed joyfully as if balloons filled with shiny confetti had just exploded in the living room. OK, no, it doesn't pop. I told her again, realizing the comparison to a balloon was leading her to this conclusion. She told the story to me again, this time to make sure I understood how her bladder works. "Fill up, up, up and...POP!!" Hahahaha!! Whee! OK, think what you want. What's the harm? It won't actually pop.

--Then there are the rare and precious jubilant expressions of unabashed sudden nakedness on her part. She even puts her clothes in the hamper when she streaks. She's so tidy. Or well-trained.

--Yesterday morning, waiting in the driveway for the school bus, she politely asked me to pick her up because the chilly damp wind had picked up. I held her and we listened to the quiet on the street, the different birdsongs. She put her warm hands on either side of my face and nuzzled my nose and giggled. We got to talking about colors and finding things outside in different colors. I said, "Find something brown. Do you see something brown?" She said, "That tree. JJ's house. Dirt." I said, "Find something purple." She said, "Our house!" (Our house is periwinkle). She gasped and said, seriously, with her hands on my cheeks, her face an inch from mine, "Mama! Our house purple (like) fruit smoothie!" Yes indeed, Eva! Eva enjoys fruit smoothies I make with blueberries, among other things. We laughed at her genius.

--This evening, Eva and I were assembling Valentines for her class party. She was practicing lines and circles on a piece of paper while she waited until it was her turn to write (with my hand to guide) her name on each Valentine. I was sitting next to her, writing kids' names on Valentines. She said, "Line. Line. Across...that 'H', Mama!" Oh, holy crap. She wrote a capital 'H'. She's never purposefully written a letter before (that I'm aware of). We celebrated and laughed. And then she did it again. And again. And again.

What a charmed life I live to be able to celebrate and laugh every day. Thank you, Eva.

Eva Meets Santa Claus!

2009-12-14T20:37:00.001-08:00

This morning, Eva told me she wanted to see "San Ta Clots". She met him at the Harley shop downtown her first Christmas, when she was 10 months old. She was mildly wary of him but let me hold her in the picture. Last year, her fourth Christmas, we went to the mall and watched Santa talk to kids from a distance of about 15 feet. She was cool with that and when I asked her if she wanted to talk to Santa, too she politely said "No, thank you."

This morning I told her: Sure! Santa is at the mall. We can go see him after nap. So all day was spent talking about going to see Santa. We talked about how he was a nice, happy man, full of love and kindness. We talked about his long white beard, his hat, his red suit. We talked about how Santa brings special presents and that Eva could tell him what she wanted for Christmas. She practiced conversations all day ("Hi Santa. How are you?" "I'm fine, Eva." "Merry Christmas, Santa." "Thank you. Bye-bye. Ho, ho, ho.") She was psyched.

Waiting for our turn to see Santa!

Having second thoughts...

She chattered nervously as we walked through the mall. She heard jingle bells and wanted to run toward the towering Santa display but held fast to my hand. We waited in a short line and watched the girl in front of us bravely sit atop Santa's knee and talk and (sorta) smile for a picture and get a little coloring book. When Santa's lap was empty, he waved a cheery hello to Eva. She waved back but then her feet were cemented to the floor. I took her by the hand, then carried her to greet Santa. I sat on the arm of his chair (noting that it was wide, cushy and sturdy enough for repeated grown up bums to rest on it) and Eva sat on my lap. He was a very friendly and gentle Santa with a real beard and twinkling blue eyes.

What did she tell him she wanted for Christmas? A new book. And peacock feathers. Santa said, "Well, uh, peacock feathers might be a little hard to come by, but I'll put it on my list and see what I can do."

Jerry snapped a few pictures of the three of us. Eva said "Thank you, Santa!" and we were on our way. Overall, a very successful meeting for my generally nervous little girl.

Happy Holidays!

Put a Smile on Your Face

2009-12-11T19:51:00.000-08:00

This video of Eva dancing to KT Tunstall's Other Side of the World always makes my heart swell. She had just turned 2 years old; it was only a couple weeks after a 10-day hospital stay, very sick with RSV and pneumonia. She was still a year and a half from walking but being on her bum certainly didn't stop her from exploring her world and enjoying herself. I appreciate the reminder to feel joy for what you have and to follow your heart's longing. Thank you, Eva.

(She signs "music" at the end).

Harvest Time

2009-09-30T19:49:00.000-07:00

As the summer slowly slips into fall and all the breezes have chilly whiskers on them, we retreat to the farms and gardens to see Mother Nature's final breaths before her quiet winter sleep.

Eva at BelleWood Acres

Eva, Mommy, and Corn at Hovander Park

A crowd of dahlias

A dahlia ready to pop

Black-eyed Susan

Skeptical turkeys at Hovander Park

The barn at Hovander Park

Blackberries!

2009-09-02T20:09:00.001-07:00

Just a quick post to express my gratitude that Eva loves blackberries. There are so few foods that she really LOVES and meal and snack times have always been challenging. So hooray for blackberries!

Today, Eva and I took a "stroller walk" to the grocery store for a few things and she spotted blackberries along the trail. They are quite abundant in our part of the country and the bushes are heavy with berries this time of year. I love the smell of blackberries in the air when out for a late summer stroll. How lucky we are to live here. I parked the stroller and started gingerly plucking blackberries while Eva reminded me "no red ones, mama. Just black". I put a small handful in her lap, maybe 8 or so and went back to picking some for myself. By the time I'd picked 2 or 3, she was chirping behind me, "More, mama? Can I have please more blackberries?" I swear, the longest sentences she puts together are for asking for blackberries. So I put another pile in the hem of her dress, like a little basket for berries. Two or three berries into my picking and she's asking again for more, purple juice smeared down her chin, her fingers dyed purple. She doesn't eat anything with such gusto! Hooray for blackberries! (Though I should add it was the same earlier with raspberries and blueberries. Off the bush and into the mouth).

She ate probably a pint or more on our stroll today. I picked another couple cups and took them home. Later this evening, she came to me at the other end of the house and put a blackberry in my mouth. Presuming (correctly) that she must have dragged her stool to the kitchen counter to reach the bowl of blackberries, I went to check that there weren't blackberries squished into the carpet. Nothing in the carpet (that I saw anyway. I'll probably find that next week when the berry starts to mold and the stain is good and set). There were, however, purple fingerprints on the counter near the bowl and down the front of the dishwasher--and all over her face and fingers and some on her jammie pants. When I asked her if they were good she just giggled and held her fingers up for me to wash: "blackberries! Yummy!"

Indeed, my sweet girl.

Tappy Shoes

2009-08-02T21:32:00.000-07:00

I may have lost my mind, but I got Eva a pair of tap shoes. She loves to dance and is especially fascinated (obsessed?) with tap dancing. Her obsession is focused primarily on Heather, Irish dancer extraordinaire from Maggie's Fury. (Heather is lovingly featured in many of Eva's original compositions). So now Eva has "tappy shoes" just like her. Look out, Heather!

The Musical Genius at Work

2009-08-02T21:17:00.000-07:00

Eva's just so musical she can hardly help herself. Here she is playing her tambourine like a bodhran (an Irish frame drum that looks like her tambourine--without the jingles--is bigger and usually played with a stick). She sings original compositions and plays her bodhran (pronounced boe'-rhan). Quite entertaining!

If it's not Scottish...it's crrrrap!

2009-06-07T22:44:00.000-07:00

We enjoyed a wonderful day at the Scottish Highland Games in Ferndale yesterday. Our friend's band, Maggie's Fury played a few sets and Eva was thrilled (and tireless) to dance and sing and clap with the band in her official Maggie's Fury t-shirt and kilt. We all enjoyed the bagpipe and drum bands. Eva couldn't get enough of the BAGPIPES! and DRUMS! Jerry and I took turns wandering around listening to the bands practice before performing for the judges. In fact, "BAGPIPES!" was the last thing she said to us last night and the first thing she said upon waking up this morning. Since her first Highland Games at age 16 months, she has LOVED bagpipes, which is great for me because I do, too.

Dancing with Heather and Colin to Maggie's Fury

Taking a bow between songs. Eva really hammed it up for the audience and periodically took a break to sit in a chair in the front row and chat with whoever was next to her.

My goodies: a leather cuff and wooden bead bracelet.

The Rooster Song

2009-05-26T21:38:00.001-07:00

This is what happens when I say "Say cheese!"

And then I explain that "say cheese" means to smile!

Here is a little video I took this evening of Eva playing her recorder and singing a little song. At the end she says "rooster". I guess that was the rooster song. Enjoy!

Eva's Library Picks

2009-05-26T21:14:00.000-07:00

We go to our wonderful Downtown (Bellingham) children's library regularly for fresh reading materials. Eva is old enough now to thoughtfully pick out which books she wants to take home, go to the counter and up the stool, hand the books to the library staff and say "these books, please". Sometimes, she tells me she's done with the library by haphazardly yanking books off those easy-to-reach shelves while I scramble behind her trying to re-order her chaos and try to slow her down. On our last trip to the library, we came home with five books. That evening, we pored over our new pile of books and I found that TWO of them made me cry as I read them. OK, I'm not generally one of those cry-at-the-commercials weepy sorts of people, but I do have a soft spot for a sweet children's book--especially one (or TWO) that my daughter thoughtfully picked out just for us.

The first book is called A Name on the Quilt: A Story of Remembrance by Jeannine Atkins. It is a beautiful story about a little girl and her family gathering to assemble a quilt square for her gay uncle who died from AIDS (this is a children's book, probably good for mid-grade school age). The family, including her uncle's partner, talk about the uncle as they assemble this quilt square made from pieces of his clothes, to be included in the AIDS Memorial Quilt. Oh jeez. Kleenex, please. (The library system has only one copy of this book, and it's at my house till June 14. Sorry!)

The second story, which I highly recommend to my many friends who parent a child with special needs, is called Ruby In Her Own Time by Jonathan Emmett. This tender story is about a family of ducks and their littlest duck, Ruby. She hatches last, is small and doesn't do what her siblings are doing. Her parents ask "Will she ever...?" and, of course, the answer is "yes, in her own time." Aaah. More Kleenex, please. What a gentle reminder to relax; that Eva will do many things...in her own time. (The library system has several copies of this book).

This reading experience with Eva was so beautiful (for lack of a shinier, more energetically glowing word) and reminded me that 1) my girl is a perfect, radiant little being; 2) I am so SO blessed to get to spend my life with her; 3) the universe will provide for me what I need, when I need it and I'd better pay attention because it might be in the form of a children's book (or two).

Eva Reads Her First Word!

2009-05-20T21:02:00.001-07:00

Yes, you read that correctly. Eva read her first word this evening (that I'm aware of anyway. She has a way of "yeah, I've done this FOREVER. What's the big deal" about her sometimes). We were reading stories before bed and I said "What's this word?" like I often do but she's never answered before. I point to each letter. "c. a. r.", she says. "Right!" I said, "what's that word say?" "CAR!" Oh my gosh. Yes, it DID say "car"! Holy cow!

Mind you, this exciting event hasn't come out of nowhere. She has always loved books and preferred looking at words over pictures (going way back to a few months old). During all the pre-preschool assessments and much to my annoyance, I had to prove it to a school official that she knew 18 letters just before she turned three. Eva has known all the letters for several months now and many letter sounds. She's been able to identify store names on the building and on top of receipts for a couple years now. We read to her. We point to the words as we read them. We have her read each letter in a word, going left to right. I've had a suspicion that she could read some words for awhile but have always explained it away.

Back in February of this year, I had a conference with Eva's preschool teacher. She told me that the woman who teaches the resource room came to the classroom for a visit one day (she doesn't usually work with the littlest kids) and she and the teacher got to talking about Eva and how she knows all her letters and really seems to absorb everything around her. Eva did a few tests in the resource room and, to everyone's joy, she scored at a kindergarten level for pre-reading skills! So the teachers started Eva on a reading program, the beginnings of which consist of matching like pictures, with other pictures as distraction. Then moving on to matching simple letter combinations, which gradually get more complex, to see if she can sort through the visual stimuli. The next step is a Reading Mastery Program with chunks of words (it stresses learning to identify the whole word, as opposed to spelling it out). So in addition to reading at home like we do, pointing out words, having her read the letters to us, we also started to label things in the house (bed, couch, table, etc.) so she could get used to seeing the words attached to things she's familiar with.

I am so grateful for wonderful teachers and staff who recognize that Eva can handle more challenges and not dismissing her desire to learn until she's "older".

What Eva taught me: to not think I know what she is capable of; to not think "oh, well that skill is for older kids, not her"; to set high standards and beam with pride when she meets them.

My little girl, 4 years, 2 months and 20 days read her first word. Car. It's music to my ears.

New Toy For Mommy

2009-05-13T21:04:00.000-07:00

I know it's been awhile since I posted and I know some of you, dear Readers, have been asking for new posts. So here is a pictorial post with Eva as my ever-agreeable subject. I recently bought a big beautiful digital SLR Nikon that I am in love with. These photos were taken with it. Enjoy!

I just love the way the late afternoon sunlight was making her eye(s) shine.

Singin' and swingin' at Hovander Homestead Park.

At Hovander. We're watching the turkeys about 15 feet away. She kept being silly and calling them "white peacocks"!

Out for a walk with Mommy on the trail by our house. A new favorite special mommy/daughter past time.

Sometimes, she just gets closer, closer, closerclosercloser!

Whee! Airplane rides from Daddy!! (I'm laying on the floor, looking up).

There's something to her expression that came through here that is very mature. I see a glimpse of what she'll look like when she's 14 or so.

Eva's Big Oh-Four

2009-03-08T20:43:00.000-07:00

(Eva dancing in her new tutu)

So it's taken me two weeks, but I'm finally posting some pics from Eva's 4th birthday party. We had a great party with a lot of our dear friends and family. THANK YOU, THANK YOU, to everyone for coming to celebrate Eva's life with us; for your kind gifts and for your generous donations to the Whatcom Humane Society. We took a collection of animal food and treats and some money to the Whatcom Humane Society. Eva was very excited to gather presents for the animals. This was the first birthday that she really knew what was going on and I'm glad we were able to incorporate the idea of giving to those who are in need.

We encourage you to donate to the Whatcom Humane Society (click here)or to your local humane society. It really is a wonderful thing to see a child give so freely. We should all learn (re-learn) to be more generous and compassionate.

(5 minutes before party time, Eva was still in a diaper and Peacock Lady dress, dancing around the living room with balloons and singing "Hap Burrrday to EVA!")

(The deck was shakin' when the kids got dancing fever. Thank goodness the weather was good so they could run around outside and play on the swing set!)

(Eva blew her candle out by herself this year! She didn't touch the cupcake, though...maybe next year.)

Sunny San Diego

2009-01-29T21:01:00.000-08:00

The three of us and Jerry's parents spent a long weekend at a gorgeous resort in San Diego. It felt sooooo good to be in the warm sunshine and to go outside with just a t-shirt on! We went to Sea World two of the days. Eva loved to see all the animals (and run around and play with other kids). If you ask her, she'll sign whale and tell you that the whales go "big spwash!!" She told me as soon as we got into Sea World that she wanted to see starfish. Though she loved the orca whales, dolphins and all the fish, her favorite thing to see were the starfish.

Eva and her Papa splashing in puddles.

Jerry, Eva and Papa doing "1, 2, 3, whee!" There was a LOT of this game on the trip. To the point where two people couldn't hold her hands without her kicking her knees up and dangling from our arms.

Quick-moving kid in a tunnel at Sea World.

Eva loved being able to run around and play with other kids.

A very friendly older girl helped Eva touch a beloved starfish! Oh, it was so exciting! And yes, she actually touched it!

Uno, dos, tres...PINATA!

2009-01-21T20:37:00.000-08:00

Eva's preschool class, kindergarten, first and second grades have been rehearsing a musical called "We All Celebrate". All the kids sing a few songs together and each grade sings a song or two on their own. Unfortunately, Eva (and Jerry and I and his parents) will be in San Diego the night of the performance! Her teachers said that she has so thoroughly enjoyed the rehearsals and being with the big kids. She does love music.

I went to a rehearsal today and took this video. They're singing "Uno, dos, tres, pinata!" The kids are encouraged to dance while they sing. Eva is, of course, the little cutie in the green sweater. (Thank you, Abby for the beautiful sweater!)

Peacock Lady, continued

2009-01-12T22:09:00.000-08:00

An update on the Peacock Lady post: In the video, the singer wears a big, dark blue cape that she theatrically flips around during her number. Eva asked for a Peacock Lady dress, so I put a blue blanket around her shoulders and fastened it with a twix-it clip. (It looks like a superhero cape, if a child were so inclined to think of it as such. To Eva, it's a Peacock Lady Dress).

So now, wearing her blue cape, she walks around the living room, flipping the sides out dramatically and sings the Peacock Lady song as she does in the video I posted earlier. Even when the Violin Show isn't on, she'll do this. It's so dang cute I almost cry. Of course, she's a camera-shy performer so I'll have to be sneaky to get this on video--and I MUST because it is so cute.

It's a...

2009-01-03T20:13:00.000-08:00

This video is for our dear friends, Lynn and Carole. Thank you so much for the gift. Eva loves it (clearly)!

Holiday Joys

2009-01-03T19:43:00.001-08:00

Happy New Year, everyone!

We three spent nine days with family in the south Sound. It was so wonderful to get out of town, away from domestic responsibilities and work and relax with family and friends. We're glad to be home now--sorta--and getting back into our routine--sorta--in time for school and work next week.

We hope you had a great holiday, too!

Eva's favorite presents included (but are not limited to) a kid's digital camera (seen here backward)...

...and bongos!

Eva loves to play the piano at my mom's house. This video was a sneaky attempt to capture her musical genius. If she saw me with the camera, she'd stop playing and yell at me. So I put the camera on the edge of the counter, pushed the button and stepped back. Next time, I'll get another angle so you can see her more clearly, but this was better than nothing!

Snow Day!

2008-12-19T21:47:00.000-08:00

"Ack, Mama! It's snowing and I can't see!"

We've had snow all week. At times, though, the temps have been so low and the wind so fierce that we couldn't go out to play. We managed a couple of times and Eva and I had fun. I'm glad I can still feel the wonder of the snowfall as a child does. The way it transforms my otherwise ordinary yard, my street, my world. I'm glad I appreciate it when it's here, before it goes away and my world becomes ordinary again.

Eva was too busy uncovering her sandbox to look at the camera.

It's serious work. No distractions, please.

My snow fairy. I went first to show her how. She thought it was very silly!

She did a snow fairy, too. But she didn't want to lay on her back, so it's a reclined snow fairy.

The Peacock Lady

2008-12-13T18:21:00.000-08:00

Eva has been really enjoying "The Violin Show", as she calls it. It's a DVD of an Andre Rieu concert in Vienna with the symphony, opera singers, and ballet and folk dancers. It's a lot of fun. Eva's favorite piece is "the peacock lady". It's Carla Maffioletti singing "Mein Herr Marquis" from Strauss' Die Fledermaus. (You can search youtube for a clip of this). She tries to sing along, which is SO cute. She even calls the "peacock lady" on her play phone. They laugh. So this video is of Eva singing opera for a bit. She sings and dances along to the other performers, too, but this is clearly her favorite.

Perspective

2008-12-12T15:40:00.001-08:00

First, a note: I know I haven't posted for awhile and it certainly isn't because there has been nothing to share. But now it's a month's worth of little things all smeared together. So back to today...

I picked Eva up a little early from school today so we could go to a dear friend's retirement party. Eva has been the Morale Booster/Therapeutic Hugger/Sweet Heart-Melting Charmer at my work since she first came when she was 3 weeks old. Everyone at my work has been incredibly loving and supportive of our family from, literally, the DAY she was born and our lives changed forever. Each coworker ("family friend" I should say because they are so much more than coworkers) has shown their love for and acceptance of us in their own way. It was wonderful today to see everyone together in one space, celebrating our dear Lynn and his new adventures as a retiree!

Back to school...we left the classroom and headed down the hallway. Eva was walking all by herself, carrying her backpack and a weep tried to escape from my throat. It was only last spring, when Eva started school, that she could walk only about halfway down the hall, holding my hand(s), before her legs would tire and I'd carry her the rest of the way. And that was a huge accomplishment. Today, I watched my little baby walk BY HERSELF the entire length of the hallway (it's about 100 feet, I guess?) No hands held; no falling; no brushing the wall for support. She was charging ahead on her own, taking a piece of my heart with her.

Another day, another reason for celebration. How lucky I am to get to celebrate so often.

HealthNewsDigest Article

2008-12-12T08:15:00.000-08:00

New Tests for Down Syndrome Could Lead to More Abortions
By Mary Carmichael | NEWSWEEK
Dec 7, 2008 - 10:30:38 AM

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(HealthNewsDigest.com) - Beth Allard was recovering from labor, waiting for a hospital photographer to capture her newborn son's first day in the world, when a pediatrician walked into her room and told Allard her life was ruined. Allard might have expected as much from a doctor, given what she'd already heard from others in the previous few months: little Ben, who had tested positive in utero for Down syndrome, would be mute and illiterate, they said; he would spend his life hanging off her, drooling. The pediatrician was harsher: "You should consider putting him up for adoption," she said. "You're going to end up divorced. Don't even bother having any other children. Didn't you have the option to terminate?" Finally, the pediatrician left, and Allard resumed her wait for the photographer. He never came.

Ben Allard is now 9, and it's hard to understand why doctors were convinced he would be such a burden. He's a friendly, witty kid who's happily enrolled in third grade at a regular school. He does, says Beth, "all the things they told us he wouldn't be doing, and more." She shudders when she thinks about how wrong the doctors turned out to be: she almost took their advice and ended her pregnancy.

She would not have been alone in that decision. Life with Down syndrome can be very challenging for both parents and kids, and according to studies, 90 percent of women whose fetuses test positive choose to abort. Now, because of a technological advance, pro-life and disability advocates worry those numbers may rise even higher. Currently, Down syndrome is picked up with blood screens and ultrasounds, then confirmed with invasive tests such as amniocentesis and chorionic villus sampling, which insert needles into the uterus and slightly increase the risk of miscarriage. Some women forgo the tests for that reason. Next year, though, new, noninvasive genetic screens that pose no harm to fetuses or mothers may start arriving in doctors' offices. If they become common, they could result in more diagnoses, more abortions, a dwindling Down population and a drop in support for families who carry to term—what Down activist Patricia Bauer has called "the elimination of an entire class of people." Even now, only 5,000 babies are born with the syndrome each year.

As technology has advanced, doctors' education about Down syndrome has lagged behind. Allard's tactless pediatrician gave her an outdated book that used the pejorative term "mongoloid." Many doctors seem unaware that early intervention with speech and occupational therapy, combined with medications or corrective heart surgery, has allowed some children to grow up relatively normally, graduating from high school and holding jobs. In a large 2005 survey, mothers of children with Down syndrome said they had received little or no information about the positive side of the condition. (Families often end up stronger. A 2003 study in the American Journal on Mental Retardation found that healthy siblings are highly empathetic; another study in the same journal this year showed that parents are less likely to divorce.) Doctors were also in the dark. "Even among obstetrics fellows, 45 percent said their training in how to deliver a diagnosis was barely adequate or nonexistent," says Dr. Brian Skotko, a pediatrics resident at Children's Hospital Boston who has studied how doctors tell patients about sensitive diagnoses. In a 2000 study published in Prenatal Testing and Disability Rights, 23 percent of doctors admitted trying to influence mothers' decisions, usually encouraging them to abort.

Until this fall, a bill based on Skotko's research—one calling for doctors to provide "accurate and up-to-date information" about Down syndrome to expectant parents—had been stalled in Congress. The new noninvasive tests "put it on the front burner and turned up the degrees," says Skotko. (So did Sarah Palin's rise; Sen. John McCain became a cosponsor shortly after naming Palin, who had a baby with Down syndrome in April, as his running mate.) The bill passed easily in September. "It was a rare political moment," says Skotko. "The pro-life people believed that women making informed decisions might be more apt to continue their pregnancies. And people who were pro-choice saw the bill as pro-information but not telling doctors what to do." There's no funding for the new law yet, but disability advocates hope it will go into effect around the same time the new genetic tests do.

The Allards are among those supporters. They testified on the bill's behalf, hoping to show lawmakers the kind of life they believed their doctors hadn't told them about. They have a strong marriage, a healthy second son and a great sense of relief that they have their first one. Ben has something good, too—a new pediatrician.

www.HealthNewsDigest.com © 2008

www.HealthNewsDigest.com

Joyous Day

2008-11-04T21:42:00.000-08:00

Two exciting things happened today. Two events that will change my life and the lives of many for the better. It is a day to be hopeful for the future and to claim a renewed sense of purpose, determination and honor.

1. Barack Obama was elected the next President of the United States by a WIDE margin; and

2. Eva has finally decided that she can successfully drink from a big girl cup (i.e., not a sippy cup with a lid).

It's a very big day in our home. Share the joy with us.

Costumes costumes!

2008-11-03T13:20:00.001-08:00

Here are a few pics of Halloween over the years.

Eva (8 months old) as a Sustainable Forester. I made the suspenders and hatchet out of felt. Seen here with Chicken Lily.

Eva (1 1/2 years) as a furry monster. Seen here with Dorothy Lily.

Eva (2 1/2 years) as a purse that I made out of a graham cracker box, an old skirt, binder rings and a hot glue gun.

And this year as a baseball player.

Fall Festivities

2008-11-03T13:06:00.000-08:00

Drawing my inspiration for a costume from Eva's interests, she dressed as a baseball player this year (shown here without her hat and mitt). This was Eva's first year trick-or-treating and first year WALKING. In years past, we've dressed her up, gone to parties and shown a few neighbors. She was a little confused over the whole process--knock, "trick or treat!", get candy, say "thank you" and leave. And since she doesn't eat candy, she wasn't that excited about her loot until a neighbor gave her a packet of microwave popcorn. Oh joy! She LOVES popcorn. (A note: I've tried to give her different kinds of candy, but she won't try it. A good side to oral-motor aversions, I guess!) BTW, Jerry is wearing a wig in this pic.

A couple weeks ago, Eva and Jerry went to the farmer's market and got three little pumpkins for us to decorate. She loved painting and applying glitter to the wet paint. LOTS of glitter. So fun!

Dancing Dress

2008-10-26T09:42:00.001-07:00

Thank you to Papa and Lala for the super cute ballet clothes. Eva can't get enough of her super cute self! Here is one of the many outfits. Watch the video at the bottom, too.

Go, Eva, Go!

2008-10-19T09:00:00.000-07:00

Check it out! Here is Eva walking all by herself--without the additional support of shoes/orthotics. She does this at home about 1/3 of the time but still prefers to scoot. She'll walk more if I remind her that she can. Yay, Eva!!

Family Day

2008-10-05T22:09:00.000-07:00

We took a drive out to Baker Lake today, had a picnic and enjoyed the humming quiet. It started off a little rainy, but after lunch, the sun came out a bit and it was quite lovely.

Eva spent A LOT of time throwing rocks into the lake. "Wooooo! Haha."

Food Triumphs

2008-09-30T21:01:00.001-07:00

We're really riding a high in the food progress department here. As mentioned the other day, Eva is eating new things. Yesterday, I was eating a salad and she said, "Mommy? Eva try salad?" So I gave her a bite of lettuce and stuff on my fork. And SHE ATE IT! My god. Then, if that wasn't enough, she asked for more. She probably had 8 bites before she was done with it.

Tonight, she had a broth-y soup with curly pasta, beans and carrots. I've learned from a Speech Language Pathologist (SLP) that this is the most complex texture to learn. Kids (babies and toddlers in most cases) learn to eat purees first, then solid finger foods. After they master that, they can combine the two, like a broth-y soup with chunks in it. It's liquid, but there are surprise non-uniform bits to chew.

I honestly felt some days that we'd never get to this point. Just like it felt like she'd never want to/be able to walk on her own. After working every day for three and a half years, it's easy to get discouraged. Think about it. Three and a half years. Every single day since the first day of her life, we have been struggling with feeding. She had a naso-gastric tube (feeding tube thru her nose to her stomach) for the first three months of her life until she was able to drink enough milk from a bottle to sustain her. Learning to eat, drink and tolerate textures is not something you can take a break from for a few days and come back to when you're not feeling frustrated, despondent, hopeless, worn out, at a loss, unable to see the goal, emotionally exhausted and tired of dealing with these struggles over and over and over and over. For Eva, the textures of foods have been the issue, plus the normal not-wanting-to-try-new-things that most little kids have. She's been able to manipulate a spoon/fork for some time now and has had a good chew, tongue movement and swallow technique for months.

So we keep at it. We remind ourselves regularly to not make mealtimes stressful, which is very VERY hard sometimes. We adhere to a mealtime routine and give her choices to feel more in control--which bib? which placemat? water or milk? what kind of cracker? We have her stand on her chair and help us cook, even if there isn't much she can do, just to keep her involved. We talk about our food: what it tastes like, the texture, the temperature, the sign(s) for it, where it comes from. I tell her everything that is in a meal, down to the spices and herbs. We give her some bit of what we're having but we don't make her try it or say she has to finish her plate. More recently, we started to talk about being hungry and full and what food does for our bodies. All of these things we've learned as we've gone along, after things have backfired and we've found ourselves struggling over every single bite.

This summer, our wonderful SLP gave us the idea to give Eva one new thing at meal time (we started with blueberries because we'd just gone blueberry picking with her) and she had to pick it up, kiss it goodbye and put it in a bowl. The idea being that she'll get a bit of the taste/texture/temperature on her lips, feel safe with it and eventually put it in her mouth. Some days she wouldn't even touch the new food, even though she knew the routine and would say it. After getting used to kissing it, we moved on to licking it and then putting it on her tongue before putting it in the bowl. It seems tedious because it is tedious but breaking things down into tiny steps is what she needed. And it worked. Things are coming together in her body and in her brain and she is making huge leaps. It makes me want to weep with joy and relief.

I am so grateful for the outstanding Speech Language Pathologists, Occupational Therapists, Physical Therapists, Teachers, and other parents who have educated us on how to help our girl and listened to our frustrations and encouraged us to keep moving forward.

I hope that I can provide encouragement and hope to someone reading this who is struggling to get through one more day.

Our Trip to the ER

2008-09-30T07:53:00.000-07:00

Well, I guess there's a first time for everything. Eva had her first trip to the ER for an injury yesterday. She's alright now but it was a traumatic experience for both of us.

She and I were leaving the PT waiting room yesterday morning after therapy. A helpful little kid was closing the waiting room door behind us. I had hold of one of Eva's hands and the other hand was in the hinge side of the door jamb, which I didn't realize until she started howling when the door was almost closed. Her ring finger was a mangled bloody mess from the last joint to the tip and she was screaming. I was panicking and crying and shaking, too. The CNP staff put a bandaid on her finger to hold things together and I calmed down enough to drive home. I called Jerry and had him call the doctor's office to see if we could get her in right away. They were unusually booked so we three headed to the ER.

After x-rays and too many people looking at her finger (in her loud opinion) it was determined that her finger was NOT broken; that the skin from her last joint to the nail bed was ripped off and a bit of the root of the nail was pushed up. She'll probably lose that nail and the new one will likely grow in with ridges in it. There wasn't much they could do to repair her finger so they wrapped it up with a lot of gauze and sent us home.

The ER staff were wonderful and we didn't have to spend a lot of time there, just over two hours. Eva's highlights were being helped by a dear family friend who works there and seeing the helicopter land. I hope that's what she remembers from the experience. And to not put her hand in the door jamb again.

3 New Tricks

2008-09-27T14:38:00.000-07:00

It's an energetic fun time in our house right now. Not only has Eva's speech skyrocketed since school started a few weeks ago (she sometimes speaks in short, complete sentences), but she has three pretty cool new tricks.

1. Suddenly, she likes to eat whole pasta and vegetables with some kind of saucy/buttery stuff to hold it together. This is a MAJOR accomplishment for a kid who didn't want to eat anything wet if it wasn't smushed. And she's eating it with a fork!! Chewing, swallowing, no choking and asking for more.

2. Eva's been arranging things (cups, crackers, blocks) into the shape of a face. "Nose...eye...eye...ear...ear..." What a huge thing to be able to visualize something in her head, and manipulate things to make that thing in front of her!! Genius!

3. Now, this one is HUGE HUGE...Eva is W-A-L-K-I-N-G!! She's been taking 4-6 steps between people for a few months, and now she's going all over the house. Like, from the bookcases, around the couch, steps over a toy and goes to the table! All on her own! Or down the hallway, thru her bedroom door, around some clutter and over to her bed! From the car, thru the garage to the door to the house! Sure, she still walks with her arms cocked out to the sides at odd angles and I try to not hold my breath watching her but I must say, I'm am beyond giddy. This is such a big deal. I'll post a video of it when I get one.

Hope.

2008-09-22T21:46:00.000-07:00

I heard this story on All Things Considered (NPR) this afternoon while I was waiting in the car during Eva's speech therapy session. Not only did the details this man expressed ring to familiar and true to me and our experience, but I thought: the more stories of families raising children with special needs that are out there in the mainstream media; the more citizens are educated and enlightened about the challenges we parents face and the many ways our lives are just like theirs--the less I feel alone.

I feel more understood as a parent, and more accepted as a family. This is what it means to be supportive of our family and those like us. We are all families--special needs or not--working as hard as we can to raise beautiful, compassionate and intelligent children.

Thank you for taking the time to educate yourself a little more and to share this with the people in your life.

My Summer Vacation...by Eva (as told to Mommy)

2008-09-20T19:15:00.000-07:00

Well, now that the weather has turned soggy and dark and I'm back in school again, it's time to reminisce about my summer vacation...

Mommy and I spent several days visiting Uncle Tommy at the beach. It was like a big sandbox and I loved to play in it and watch the waves...I helped Mommy tend to her roses...and rode my bike in the driveway... I took my very first sailboat ride. I liked it pretty well and want to go again...I was very busy helping Mommy cook in the kitchen with my "stand up" chair...We had our yearly visit with a lot of family from my Grandpa Moen's side. Mommy's cousin and kids came all the way from China! My Great Uncle Allen is a lot sillier than people think he is...Mommy and Daddy took me to watch a softball game. That was the greatest thing ever! I LOVE sports!! Oh! And the Olympics were on TV! I LOVED the Olympics--especially swimming and diving...Mommy bought me a new flower sprinkler so I conducted many physics experiments with it in my pool...Mommy and I had a picnic at Hovander Park...and she taught me how to use the camera. See? Daddy and I went with Mommy to get another tattoo...I figured out how to use my stool to reach the light switch!And I played at the park with my friends; visited my Papa, Lala, Grandma, Eric, Uncle Brent, Aunt Caasi, Cousin Porter; learned how to say my name and my Mom and Dad's names; and learned thousands of little things about the world. AND, most exciting, I am walking all by myself! My record is 13 steps, unassisted. I still prefer to scoot, but I can stand up from the ground and walk and can creep around furniture. I'm still a little nervous about it all, but everyone gets really excited when I do it, so I guess I'll keep doing it!

I'm a busy little girl and I had a busy, fun summer. Now I'm back in school and I'm a constant chatterbox and curious little girl. I hope you had a fun summer, too!

When You're Weary...Feeling Small...

2008-09-03T22:13:00.000-07:00

If this doesn't warm your heart, well, I don't think anything can. Biased? No. See for yourself.

Because Eva is Just Like Every One of You

2008-09-03T22:10:00.000-07:00

The "R" word

2008-08-31T10:56:00.000-07:00

It DOES matter what you say

2008-08-31T10:52:00.000-07:00

This was copied from a friend's blog. Please consider what you think about people with Down syndrome and educate yourself and others. Thank you.

In light of the new VP candidate for John McCain, the NDSS has submitted a Press Release about the proper etiquette and language for addressing Down syndrome. Mommy thought it was highly appropriate and wanted to share it with everyone....PS the myth about individuals with Down syndrome being happy all the time is a particular pet-peeve of Mommy's. HOORAY that they addressed that!

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
Contact: Sarah Schleider

212-763-4369/ 917 921 9889 (cell) sschleider@ndss.org

Governor Sarah Palin of Alaska has been selected as John McCain’s choice for Vice Presidential nominee of the Republican Party. Governor Sarah Palin recently gave birth to her son who has Down syndrome. The Palins knew before their son’s birth that he would have Down syndrome.

Below are tips for the proper use of language for ‘Down syndrome’. The National Down Syndrome Society and the National Down Syndrome Congress encourages all media to use the below language:

• Down vs. Down’s. NDSS and NDSC use the preferred spelling, Down syndrome, rather than Down’s syndrome. While Down syndrome is listed in many dictionaries with both popular spellings (with or without an apostrophe s), the preferred usage in the United States is Down syndrome. This is because an “apostrophe s” connotes ownership or possession. Down syndrome is named for the English physician John Langdon Down, who characterized the condition, but did not have it. The AP Stylebook recommends using “Down syndrome” as well.

• People with Down syndrome should always be referred to as people first. Instead of “a Down syndrome child,” it should be “a child with Down syndrome.” Also avoid “Down’s child” and describing the condition as “Down’s,” as in, “He has Down’s.”

• Down syndrome is a condition or a syndrome, not a disease.

• People “have” Down syndrome, they do not “suffer from” it and are not “afflicted by” it.

• It is clinically acceptable to say “mental retardation,” but you may want to use the more socially acceptable “cognitive disability” or “cognitive impairment.”

Down Syndrome Myths and Truths

Myth: Down syndrome is a rare genetic disorder.
Truth: Down syndrome is the most commonly occurring genetic condition. One in every 733 live births is a child with Down syndrome, representing approximately 5,000 births per year in the United States alone. Today, more than 400,000 people in the United States have Down syndrome.

Myth: People with Down syndrome have a short life span.
Truth: Life expectancy for individuals with Down syndrome has increased dramatically in recent years, with the average life expectancy approaching that of peers without Down syndrome.

Myth: Most children with Down syndrome are born to older parents.
Truth: Most children with Down syndrome are born to women younger than 35-years-old simply because younger women have more children. However, the incidence of births of children with Down syndrome increases with the age of the mother.

Myth: People with Down syndrome are severely “retarded.”
Truth: Most people with Down syndrome have IQs that fall in the mild to moderate range of intellectual disability (formerly known as “retardation”). Children with Down syndrome fully participate in public and private educational programs. Educators and researchers are still discovering the full educational potential of people with Down syndrome.

Myth: Most people with Down syndrome are institutionalized.
Truth: Today people with Down syndrome live at home with their families and are active participants in the educational, vocational, social, and recreational activities of the community. They are integrated into the regular education system and take part in sports, camping, music, art programs and all the other activities of their communities. People with Down syndrome are valued members of their families and their communities, contributing to society in a variety of ways.

Myth: Parents will not find community support in bringing up their child with Down syndrome.
Truth: In almost every community of the United States there are parent support groups and other community organizations directly involved in providing services to families of individuals with Down syndrome.

Myth: Children with Down syndrome must be placed in segregated special education programs.
Truth: Children with Down syndrome have been included in regular academic classrooms in schools across the country. In some instances they are integrated into specific courses, while in other situations students are fully included in the regular classroom for all subjects. The current trend in education is for full inclusion in the social and educational life of the community. Increasingly, individuals with Down syndrome graduate from high school with regular diplomas, participate in post-secondary academic and college experiences and, in some cases, receive college degrees.

Myth: Adults with Down syndrome are unemployable.
Truth: Businesses are seeking young adults with Down syndrome for a variety of positions. They are being employed in small- and medium-sized offices: by banks, corporations, nursing homes, hotels and restaurants. They work in the music and entertainment industry, in clerical positions, childcare, the sports field and in the computer industry. People with Down syndrome bring to their jobs enthusiasm, reliability and dedication.

Myth: People with Down syndrome are always happy.
Truth: People with Down syndrome have feelings just like everyone else in the population. They experience the full range of emotions. They respond to positive expressions of friendship and they are hurt and upset by inconsiderate behavior.

Myth: Adults with Down syndrome are unable to form close interpersonal relationships leading to marriage.
Truth: People with Down syndrome date, socialize, form ongoing relationships and marry.

Myth: Down syndrome can never be cured.
Truth: Research on Down syndrome is making great strides in identifying the genes on chromosome 21 that cause the characteristics of Down syndrome. Scientists now feel strongly that it will be possible to improve, correct or prevent many of the problems associated with Down syndrome in the future.

For more information visit: www.ndss.org or www.ndsccenter.org

This Is How It's Done

2008-07-31T20:50:00.000-07:00

I recently bought Eva a winter coat (on super clearance!) It has a zip-out puffy jacket--magenta--and a lighter weight rain coat with. She picked it out. She loves herself some pink and pink! Here, she demonstrates how to put on your coat, even if it is a little big just yet.

First, you put your arms in like this...

...then you try to get your hands out of the sleeves and purse your lips at Momma cuz the coat's too big...

...and then you flip the whole thing over your head and--ta da!--your coat is on and hood is up and you are so proud of yourself!

Eva's Art Show

2008-07-31T14:59:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago, we had a Summer BBQ and Art Show featuring Eva's artwork from school. Thanks to our many friends who joined us for a relaxing afternoon!

Eva's art from school

More art from school

The "Arteest"getting some love from Mommy.

Mz. Independent

2008-07-11T13:01:00.000-07:00

Eva and I were running errands today. She was feeling the need to continuously express her fervent opinions to me and I was thinking "OK, let's get thru this and get home!" At Fred Meyer, our last stop, nearing the finish line. I was gently but firmly dragging her (she insisted on walking but was stopping every couple feet to complain) from the bathroom toward the bank of shopping carts, sharing knowing smiles with other moms. In front of Playland (where you drop your kids to play with their toys for up to an hour) she stopped dead in her tracks, the soles of her shoes suddenly stuck to the primary-colored tiles. "C'mon, honey", I cajoled. "Play mommeeeee!"

I'd never taken her to Playland before and she'd never show any interest in going. So, OK. Let's do it. She went thru the door and was busily playing before I'd even signed my name. Walking away to get a shopping cart, I could hardly keep the smile from my lips. I was free to shop without a whining child--for the next 60 minutes. But I was also proud of my big brave girl and my heart swelled with love. I dawdled thru the store and picked her up 45 minutes later. She had a great time and was in much better spirits when we left.

Once we got home, I got the wagon out to put all our bags in and pull to the house. Usually, she sits in the wagon with the bags and we make only one trip from the car. Today, she wanted to help. "Push, mommy, push". I was going to have her walk holding my hand while I pulled the wagon, but she had a better idea. She cruised (holding on to the wagon and walking sideways) from the front to the back. "Push, mommy!" I pulled the wagon and she walked from behind, pushing all the way into the garage. Cruising and walking while pushing something are both skills we are practicing. I was so proud of her that a) she did it and b) she came up with the ideas all by herself. Then she helped unload the groceries in the kitchen, ate miniscule bits of raw broccoli and scooted away with the bag of chocolate chips.

Life is so good on the days when I can enjoy the little things like these.

Beach Babes

2008-06-22T21:28:00.000-07:00

Eva and I took a last minute trip to Lincoln City, Oregon this week to visit my brother, Tom. Tom has a little place one block from a beach access and we were graced with gorgeous, sunny weather--warm, even! Eva and I had a lovely time traveling. She is great on adventures; keeps herself happy and busy in the car and loves to watch the scenery go by. Even though I was plagued by shivering fever and massive, raw, painful tonsils of tonsilitis the entire trip, (sorry for the cooties left behind, Tom!) the three of us enjoyed our time hanging out together as a family.

One of Eva's favorite games was to chase the waves out to sea. Thank god for Tom because I was in no condition to run back and forth on the beach over and over. And over. I took these pics from my spot in the sand at Pacific Beach.

And squeal and laugh as the waves chased her. She tried to turn and look at how close they were while she was running. And squealing and laughing.

A niece and an uncle chilling in the sand.

What to do when you have sand in everywhere and Uncle Tommy has only a stand-up shower? Improvise with a storage tub, of course!

Making fast motorcycle noises at a park a couple blocks from Tom's place. This was the day before we left--the first non-sunny day.

Little Steps

2008-06-09T21:54:00.000-07:00

Eva took her first unassisted steps yesterday at Jayna Bean's seizure free celebration! It all starts with three staggering steps (and months and months and months of hard work). Yay, Eva!!

Pa-a-a-a-a-a-rk!!!

2008-06-09T13:39:00.001-07:00

Thanks, Daddy!

Jerry built Eva a playground in the backyard. It's so fun and sturdy (we can sit in the fort and swing on the swings, too!!) Jerry did a great job completing this massive project in his "spare time" with minimal help from me. Of course, it's been raining almost constantly for more than a week, so she's been able to play on it only a little bit. Summer's coming, right? Thanks, Jerry! I've always wanted a swing in my back yard! I mean, Eva. Eva's always wanted a swing...

Here's the frame! Wow, that's gonna be big.

Laying the decking and putting up the rails.

YAY! Hi Mommy!!

(it will have a slide next to the stairs when we buy one)

And here is Eva checking out her completed playground for the first time. Oh, the joy!

A Walking Girl

2008-06-01T20:26:00.000-07:00

Eva's doing great walking holding one hand. She's taken a couple stumbling steps between people but I don't know if she knew she was on her own. I'm so thrilled to be able to have her walk next to me. I've been waiting for this for over two years (she's 3 yrs. 3 mo.) We walk thru the stores together; we go across the street to get the mail. And slowing down to her pace is a good exercise in slowing my mind down, too, which is always necessary and good. Here are a couple videos in our backyard from this afternoon. You'll notice her big exciting playground in the background that Jerry has been working on. I'll post a series of pictures of the project when he's finished with it, later this week.

Burnin' Off Some Energy

2008-06-01T12:03:00.001-07:00

Before bed last night, Eva was singing into her shaker (like a microphone) while watching Celtic Thunder w/Jerry on PBS. Of course, she wouldn't do it for the camera till the last two seconds of the video. Oh well. Anyway, she tried to stand several times and got some good downward dog poses in there, too.

Folklife Festival

2008-05-27T21:14:00.000-07:00

The Space Needle at dusk.

We enjoyed a fabulous, fun, relaxing weekend as a little family of three. We spent the better part of Saturday and Sunday at the Seattle Center watching cool musicians of every sort, dancing with the huge crowds and people watching. Eva had a lot more fun than when we took her two years ago and we did, too. She spent the nights at my mom's and Jerry and I had a hotel room a couple blocks from the Seattle Center. He and I had some much needed couple time to remember why we married each other--five years ago Saturday--and remind ourselves that we still like to hang out together. The three of us had some much needed family time to relax, have fun, enjoy music out of our usual genres, and be silly, which is good for all of us. I hope you had a relaxing start to the summer festival season and are as excited as I am for all the upcoming outdoor/musical/community events. See you there!

Eva and Jerry lounging in our hotel.

Eva standing all by herself; giggling! She's been practicing over and over.

Eva listening to a bagpipe and drum band--she LOVED it, though she looks a little concerned here.

Listening to Zimbabwean mbiras (big wooden xylophones) and gourd shakers.

Seattle Times Article

2008-04-28T14:01:00.000-07:00

The Times did an article about Down syndrome, aging and a new civil rights movement. Click HERE to read it.

Springtime in My Backyard

2008-04-18T15:09:00.000-07:00

Color has finally returned to my dwelling space!

Yellow tulips

Blueberry

Cream tulip

Dandelion

Candytuft

I forgot what this is...

Fiery tulip

Pretty little purple flowers

Aahhh. Everything is better when spring comes.

Goal!

2008-04-11T08:04:00.000-07:00

Eva and Jerry enjoyed a little Daddy-Daughter soccer match the other day. She has quick moves. I think she won.

Yeah!! FOO FIGHTERS!! Woooooo-ooo!

2008-03-31T21:27:00.000-07:00

Oh man! Oh. MAN!! I'm groggy tired and concert sweaty. Foo Fighters put on an awesome show in Vancouver, BC last night. AWESOME! Measly words aren't capturing my emphatic exclamations! Two plus hours of enthusiastic, crowd-engaging musicianship. As Dave (Grohl, lead singer/guitarist. Former drummer for Nirvana) said, getting the crowd all amped up: This is gonna be a different kind of Foo show. And how! They played old stuff (they've been around 12 years, so their music was with me all thru my 20s). They played new stuff. They played an acoustic set. They played "balls-out wall of guitars rock n' roll" to use Dave's terms. The acoustic set, which was on a small round stage at the other end of the intimate 16,000 seat coliseum, had four additional Foos playing including a percussionist who played a rockin' triangle solo. Yes, a tinkly triangle, ringing out from the mic, in an inspired little ditty of a solo.

Dave is an energetic showman, running all over the stage, down a long catwalk and back, all while rockin' out on a guitar. He talked with the audience a few times, so comfortable on stage and with himself he could've been in a coffee shop. He is very effective at getting large amounts of people to loose their friggin' minds. It was so loud. The music and the fans. When they were playing hardest, the little hairs inside my sinuses were vibrating. But then, there'll be a song where it's just Dave on an acoustic guitar and it's so pure and hushed and beautiful. Now THAT'S what I call a good performers! We laughed. We sang. We stood up and cheered. We clapped to the beat. We rocked our asses off!

Our seats were perfect--a bit to the side of the stage, up a bit so we weren't distracted by all the other concert-goers in our line of vision. I could see his strangely white teeth catch the light on occasion as he grinned (he's really very goofy and funny) or snarled in his Rock Star way. The other guys, Taylor Hawkins (drums), Nate Mendel (bass), and Chris Shiflett (guitars) each proved to be incredibly creative and uber-talented at what they do.

By the end, Jerry and I were exhausted from the rockin' out, the emotional nostalgic trip, stimulus and mass energy (i.e. the energy of being with thousands of people, sharing a similar charged experience). Never mind that it was 11:30 p.m. when they finished their encore. Waaaaaay past our bedtimes. We got home around 1:00 a.m. Poor Jerry had to get up at 5:00 a.m. to go to work and THEN had school afterward. He just got home at 9:45 p.m. But he said it was all worth it to see these guys. I agree. My body is still buzzing from the experience and my brain is still playing their songs. We will definitely be spending some good money to see them again.

Our First Egg Hunt

2008-03-23T11:54:00.000-07:00

Happy Easter Everyone!

We had so much fun at an egg hunt yesterday. Thank you to our hostesses for a wonderful party. The weather even held out long enough!

I'm showing Eva how this whole egg hunt thing works. She picked it up right away.

Eva practicing how to pull herself up to stand.

Bus, Mama! BUS!!

2008-03-20T11:36:00.000-07:00

Ready for school!

Eva started taking the bus to/from preschool yesterday and LOVES it. L.O.V.E.S. it. The little yellow bus comes to our driveway and I help her get on and the driver, Stephanie, helps her into her car seat (a school district car seat already attached to the seat). Cooper was over this morning and we three stood outside to wait for the bus. When Eva saw it coming down the street, she shrieked, "BUS! MAMA! BUS! BUS!" and wiggled and jumped up and down (in her own way, without her feet leaving the ground). She pulled me down the driveway. She and Cooper stood at the bottom of the stairs and Stephanie said, "C'mon, Cooper. Go up the steps and hang on to the rail". He just stood there holding my hand. He was very cool about riding the bus. Eva nudged him out of the way and started to climb the stairs all by herself, radioing in on another friend who was already on the bus and calling her name. It's quite possibly the most exciting thing to happen to her. She talked about it all day yesterday and will today, too, I'm sure. Stephanie said yesterday that Eva jabbered all the way home. She's so silly and funny and I love her so much. My big girl.

A New House!

2008-03-19T21:55:00.000-07:00

Thank you to Grandma and Eric for the fab new playhouse. Eva can't get enough of going inside, closing the door, knocking on the door, "Allo? Alloooo?" (she's French), coming out, chasing Jerry round and round and round, peek-a-booing over the top, putting baby to bed inside. It's true what they say about the kid's favorite part of a gift being the box it came in.

Viva Las Vegas!

2008-03-19T21:07:00.000-07:00

Jerry and I escaped to Vegas for a long weekend (without Eva!) and had a wonderful time. It had its moments, sure, but I won't go into them here. I could easily get used to not cooking, cleaning, changing diapers and all that other daily drudgery I mindlessly perform. It was heavenly to lay in the sun and read my chick lit book by the pool. I loved going shopping, just Jerry and me, like we used to. Laughing, picking out clothes for each other, sharing a dressing room and coming out looking fabulous. OK, I know that sounds like I was shopping with my best girlfriend, and it would be pretty much the same if I was, and that's the point. Jerry and I got to hang out like best friends, which is something we don't do nearly enough anymore.

A major highlight was seeing Cirque du Soleil: Beatles LOVE. Oh. my. gawd. That was A-MAZ-ING. The athleticism, artistic expression via modern dance, visually expressed creativity. I want to do that. I want to be strong enough and fearless enough to swing and contort on ropes dangling from 30 feet up. I want to be able to move my body in ways that communicate what my heart speaks. The sound system for the show was superb, too. There were even speakers in the head rest of every seat! This show was crammed full of creative expression; a feast for the senses. There were even bits where the performance came into the audience--a performer flying right over your head, confetti exploding onto everyone, a HUGE silken parachute spread over everyone's heads (it was theatre-in-the-round seating). The mondo margarita in the souvenir glass didn't hurt either.

After the show, while hovering behind my father-in-law at a slot machine, giving him good gambling juju (I'm bored by gambling but have a knack for bringing good luck to others by pushing the buttons on their machines) I nudged something with my foot. Hm, what's this? A $100 chip on the floor! Woo-hoo! That paid for the two pair of badass jeans I bought with Jerry earlier in the day. (I'm wearing them in the above picture). I cashed in my chip for a crisp $100 bill and put it in my wallet (and in the bank when I got home). I took a lot of crap from my in-laws because I wouldn't throw it into a machine and possibly double my money--or lose it all, from my standpoint. I didn't have to do a damn thing or lose any money to get that $100. That's a pretty good profit, if you ask me!

How did Miss Eva fare, you ask? Man, she was fine (which I knew she would be; it was me I was worried about). She had a sleepover at Cooper's Friday night, my mom and Eric came Saturday and Sunday and Eva went back to Cooper's Sunday night till we got home Monday afternoon. She wasn't nearly as excited to see us as I thought she should be. Oh well. She's a big girl now, so...

I'm relieved that everything went smoothly for us and for Eva and her keepers. And I'm glad to be back home, even though there's laundry, dishes, grocery shopping, bills, vacuuming...

My Time

2008-03-05T13:16:00.000-08:00

A few people have asked me recently, "So, what do you do when Eva's at school?" Well, I do whatever I want. Whatever I want. I don't stay home very much. I do things that I can't do with her or are easier when I'm by myself. This week, I explored hilly, dippy, woody trails that are too bumpy/narrow/steep for her stroller (e.g. Arroyo Park, Whatcom Falls Park). I run or walk until the songs from Signing Time stop playing in my head to the beat of my footfalls. I go until I get into a zone and then I keep going. I don't listen to music so I'm alone (alone!) with my own thoughts. I compose essays in my mind, like this one. I notice the shiny green buds on the trees and hear the birdies calling to each other in the canopy over my head and know that spring is coming.

Today's trail was great--knotted with roots and rocks, hills and dips, curving around trees. A natural trail. Not some smoothed out, gravel-packed, wide boulevard of a maintained trail. Those are great for strollers but when I'm alone, I want to get off the trail and onto something more exciting. This trail had a long sweeping railroad tie staircase that was fun to run down and leap up a couple times. And a smooth blue-green pond that fell over a waterfall. There were trees everywhere and duck pairs hanging out in the morning sun. Ah, deep breath. On a narrow bridge over the waterfall, I meditated and stretched for a bit. The sun warmed my back and relaxed my muscles. The rush of water drowned out any white noise of civilization and the swirls and bubbles focused my vision to the Now.

Then, I hopped and walked briskly back down the trail, up the stairs and walked as fast as I could back to the trail head. There, I met an elderly Russian gentleman whose truck broke down (his radiator, I think). I offered him my cell phone but he said, in choppy thick English that he didn't know how to use one and needed a tow truck. So I phoned a couple places and got him a tow truck with only 10 minutes to wait. He was so grateful when he cupped my hand between both of his strong old man hands. His voice wavered a bit as he said, "Thank you. Bless you." over and over. It feels so good to do something for someone when my only reward is this fuzzy feeling.

So this is what I do when Eva is at school. I also take a shower, eat bread with peanut butter and honey and drink a cup of milk after getting sweaty. I write. I don't do chores (though I organize them in my head) or run errands or talk on the phone. I don't get on the computer or idly flip through a magazine or do other time-sucking things. I do this: sit on the back deck and write and soak up the sun (in jeans and a sweatshirt--it's not spring yet!)

First Day of Preschool

2008-02-26T20:10:00.000-08:00

So Eva went to preschool today and had a good time. She was content to play with the play kitchen and scoot over to the books (we'd visited the classroom a few times already) and even said "Bye, mama! See you!" when I said she was going to stay and play and I was going to go. Until my hand touched the doorknob to leave. She turbo-scooted across the floor with a whimper and a distressing expression. I offered some sort of soothing words, though in my rattled state I don't recall what they were. The classroom assistant said, "Go. It's OK. You can call us any time you need to." Whoosh. I closed the door behind me.

I walked down the hallway; searching for the nearest exit; blinking furiously. Every cell was tingling and I was trembling slightly. My chest felt curiously like it would both collapse inward and explode at the same time. As the cool outside air filled my lungs I thought, "I'm not far enough into my life to have a kid in school". By that, I meant, my memories of my childhood friends' parents were that they were adults. They had it all figured out. They didn't have the insecurities, doubt, and emotional turmoil we kids had. It's possible I was mislead by their taller stature and that some of them had life no more figured out than I did then. Than I do now.

I drove home in a fog. Mixed-emotion tears and a wry, proud smirk on my face. I had grand plans of an hour and some of yoga in a quiet house this morning. But a bladder infection, which assailed me last night and a mind full of words itching to get on paper put those plans on hold. Maybe tomorrow.

When I picked Eva up, two hours later, she seemed neither stricken by my absence nor reluctant to leave school. She chatted at me all the way home, about swings, trains, and backpacks. She was tired early this evening though has been fighting the sleepies. Her little brain a firestorm of synapses. Thus began our long journey through public school.

"Go ahead, mama. I'm ready for school".

Beautiful Birthday

2008-02-25T21:46:00.000-08:00

Friday was a gorgeous, warm day for Eva's big oh-3 birthday. We spent almost two hours on a walk and playing at the park up the hill. We spent some good mommy-daughter time together, just hanging out, basking and relaxing. Spring is coming.

Thank you to everyone for your birthday gifts and well-wishes. I am so grateful to have so many caring people in our lives.

Yikes!

2008-02-20T21:01:00.000-08:00

Eva starts special ed preschool on Tuesday (2/26) at Northern Heights ES! Excitement and anxiety are closely related emotions and I think they're both in me right now. More to come next week...

Rock Out!

2008-02-19T17:40:00.000-08:00

I swear, I never get tired of watching her enjoying music. Do you? (This is KT Tunstall, FYI). In the second one, she's singing/signing "no, no, no, noooo" and "woo hoo" to the music and says "bye-bye, see you, hagaday!" (have a good day).

Woo-oooooo!

2008-02-17T21:17:00.000-08:00

Eva and Jerry were rockin' out yesterday to a nitty-gritty down-low blues riff. She feels the blues, way down in her very soul. Sing it, sister.

Breakfast!

2008-02-17T21:08:00.000-08:00

A moment in our lives February 1, 2008. Eva loves to feed baby--much more than she loves to feed herself. Hey, if it gives her the sense of power she needs to be in control of the food, then whatever. And, it's darn cute (again) to just sit back and watch her. Baby's eating some savory wooden food. Eva says and/or signs cheese, bread, bib, bowl, spoon, baby out and some other stuff...

Jam Session

2008-02-17T20:39:00.000-08:00

Eva and Jerry play music and sing A LOT (drums, xylophone, tambourine, shakers, guitar, piano, etc. etc. etc.) It brings me such joy to see them absorbed in their own world together. This was last month. She's wearing my belt as a guitar strap.

KT's Groove v.2

2008-02-17T20:23:00.000-08:00

Here we are in October 07, rockin' out, again, to KT Tunstall. She has pretty good moves for being on her bum! She counts to three at the beginning. Then, gets side-tracked by her car book (she signs "car").

Eva's Got Da Blues

2008-02-17T20:15:00.000-08:00

In mid-August 07, Eva figured out how to blow thru her harmonica! A big accomplishment, as any SLP or parent of a kid with oral motor issues would appreciate. Plus, it's darn cute. Again, we're a blues-y household.

Where's Mama?

2008-02-17T20:04:00.000-08:00

This game went on and on and on. She just kept laughing HYSTERICALLY! This is from July 07.

Wheee!

2008-02-17T19:48:00.000-08:00

This video is from May 07 (she's 2 and some yrs. old) when she was pushing her car and saying "Wheeee!!" I just love her girly little voice.

KT's Groove

2008-02-17T15:50:00.000-08:00

OK, so the video feature was new to me at the time (March 07) so it's sideways. Anyway, Eva's rockin' out to KT Tunstall. We love KT Tunstall in this house.